Friday, December 15, 2006

Nothing like a good melt-down once in a while....

Lately I've been really stressed about the adoption. According to our agency, all dossiers in China that haven't been reviewed yet are subject to the new CCAA guidelines. Since they have reviewed dossiers through January 2006, ours is being reviewed right now after almost 10 months of being logged in.

The official announcement from the CCAA on the new guidelines is expected next week, but our agency has already given us a heads up on a couple of changes, one of which will effect our dossier. Also, the Rumor Queen has listed lots of other possible changes and there may be another strike against us if she is right.

I have hardly complained about the adoption process. Instead of sitting around whining about the wait, I've been keeping myself busy and focusing on the positive things about waiting (there actually is lots of positive things). Actually, the waiting to me is nothing compared to the uncertainty of this whole thing....that's what REALLY gets to me.

Earlier this week, I let the negative thoughts take over and I had my first full-scale, cry-fest, melt-down because I was just absolutely sure that the CCAA would take a big red "reject" stamp to our dossier. Why, oh why, does the big annual CCAA meeting HAVE to be right at the time they are reviewing OUR dossier after 10 months of it sitting on a shelf some where gathering dust!!!!!!!!! It sickens me to think that they could actually hold already logged in dossiers up to a brand new standard. Don't they know that when you change a rule, it's only supposed to be for the newbies?? Don't they know this in China??

I feel now that I will not rest until the CCAA's website is updated to say they have reviewed dossiers through February 2006. Please tell me that I'm not alone in this total frustration and that I'm not the only one in melt-down mode. I'm assuming one day I'll look back on all this and won't believe I was so stressed out, but right now I just can't help myself. Joe and I so want to be parents and we've just been through enough already...please send good vibes to China on our behalf so they let our dossier go on through to the next step.


Ford & Alyson said...

We're sending you more than good vibes. While promises should not be made, our hearts tell us you all will be fine. FWIW, You all will be in our daily walk. Hang in there. This has to be unimaginalble pressure you all are living under. Stay tight with one another. Things are cool. You'll see. Peace...


Doris & Dan Clark said...

I too had a bad beginning of the week. Fingers crossed that they just review and move it along!!!

You are not alone!!

Keep smilin!

Connie said...

I think we're gonna be okay. It may take forever but we'll be okay.

My agency said the new rules would NOT apply to those already LID. I'm hoping they know what they are talking about.

Melt away...we all have those days to be sure.

Susan said...

I held my breath so many times it's a wonder my brain survived it. Meltdowns were a part of my routine. A good cry cleanses the least I try to convince myself of that :) Hang in there. The site will be updated soon and you'll be that one step closer to your little girl.

Anonymous said...

It's been a difficult week - too much uncertainty!

Heather said...

I know - remember that we're in this together :-) I'm trying to have faith that everything will be ok and we'll be bringing our children home as planned (but if ever a good cry was merited, now seems to be that time)!

M3 (Mary-Mia) said...

I'm sending you huge good vibes and all the good thoughts I can think. My gut tells me any changes will only apply to new applications going forward, for what it's worth. But I know nothing will make you feel better until there's been some real communication about it. Hang in there Donna!

Kim said...

I just have to believe that the new restrictions will only apply to dossiers submitted after the date they have set forth. But I know this doesn't reduce your worry and know all too well the stress you're going through.

I'm sending positive thoughts your way, but I don't think you'll need them. You're going to be just fine. I know it.


Nancy & Brian said...

My heart goes out to you my friend. I thought all dossiers before May 1 2007 would be grandfathered in? It is easy to tell you to relax that everything will be fine, that you'll get your referral and on and on. I do believe that to be true, however I have been there when I thought it wouldn't happen. All I can say is that most of those feelings do wash away when you see her face and read her info. In a month when we hold her in our arms, I'll be able to tell you that the whole wait and everything is worth it to have this particular child be yours. All will work out for you both. I know it!

Anonymous said...

Donna and Joe,
We feel the very same way, after all this waiting to have rule changes that may affect us, is just hard to handle. We want to be parents so bad and to think there may be one more hard. We are just hoping and praying and trying to keep the faith! Hang in there.
Emily and Mel

Dawn and Dale said...

Hey!! I hear ya!! I believe Dale and I would not qualify eaither if we were to be "examined" under the new rules as well. It's tough!!

I'll be one happy lady when I hear that APRIL (LID April 5) is OUT of the REVIEW room.

Praying for us all!!


Christi said...

Dear Donna, I have been where you are and know how hard it is. There is a lot that I haven't shared yet, but hope to someday soon, that caused uncertainty all throughout the process, and I know what you's the worst part. I just don't believe you've come this far to be rejected. I pray that God will give you peace. Prayer becomes the one thing you really can do something about. We are all pulling for you and Joe. BTW, thank you for the Christmas card! I didn't get any out this year but I am enjoying getting them. I will do better next year.

Tammy said...

No great words of wisdom here. I think many of us stressed and worried, and worried, until that baby was placed in our arms. However, you have that worry tenfold with the new guidelines and extra long wait.

FWIW, our agency has sent notice to all parents trying to ease their mind and letting all waiting parents know that China has changed their guidelines many times in the past and those changes have NEVER impacted those who were already logged in.

Sending good thoughts and hugs your way.

Take care.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry that you are feeling this way. It is a real tough time and even tho we were logged in last October - ya really just never know these days until you have your baby in your hands.

Sending cyber hugs your way!

rubyiscoming said...

Donna & Joe,

Truly, truly, we feel your pain. We too are biting the nails on both hands, waiting for the update that says that CCAA has reviewed all dossiers through Feb 2006!

Fingers CROSSED,
Kim & Joel