This graphic sums up how I've been feeling lately.
Between the stress at my office right now, not knowing if we'll see our daughters face in a couple of weeks or a couple of months and the China baby formula problem, I'm just about ready to tear my hair out! I've been stressed and SOOO emotional this week.
Just in case you're out of the loop on the baby formula situation, let me give you the Reader's Digest version of what's going on...some people decided it would be a great idea to water down milk with a dangerous chemical called melamine...yes, the stuff that's in plastic. This allows them to stretch out their supply of milk and causes a false high protein level when the milk goes through inspection. This milk has been used to make baby formula and distributed throughout China (yes, including orphanages) to feed babies. The melamine causes kidney stones and kidney failure, among other things. What kind of sickos would put babies in danger like this. I can only imagine what the parents in China are going through right now...not even knowing for sure what is safe to feed their babies. The thought of our daughter being feed a dangerous chemical for an unknown amount of time makes me sick to think about.
So far, the early rumors on referrals aren't good. Supposedly the CCAA may be checking into what type of formula the orphanages have been using, which may effect the number of referrals they kick out. At this point, we don't know what will happen. We don't know if they will continue to refer babies from orphanages using the tainted formula or not. Certainly if they don't that will more than likely decrease the number of referrals since the number of available children would drop.
I always thought the end of this journey right before referral would be happy and exciting...looking forward to seeing our daughter for the first time. Instead I'm feeling anxiety, stress and sadness.
I don't want to be a downer, but I'm having trouble seeing the light at the end of the tunnel right now.